We are geeky sexual deviants and this is our blog where we discuss fetishes, bondage, sex toys and the development of our our social network for sexual deviants like ourselves, FetLife.com.
and the compliment has nothing to do with my english skills…
Is John going to be on this podcast? He is awesome, you two are like peas and carrots! Don’t get me wrong I do miss Sin but John is cooler than the ice in a skating rink!
Now how is that for street cred missy!
Psst… I am a big looser in real life… just don’t tell anyone.
Listen to me on PizzaBabe’s podcast (I am on every second time… kind of…)
My alter ego, Fred: “Having to always enter in your username and password every time you come to FetLife?”
Me: “Umm… yeah… that is annoying… but that is not what I was trying to get at… but thanks for the reminder dick!”
You know what really annoys me? When I look at someone’s profile and wonder to myself if I ever spoke to this person before and if so what the hell did we speak about. You see where I am going with this don’t you?
Now, when you look at a user’s profile, if you have spoken to them before, right underneath “Message <Nickname>”, there will be a link titled “Our Conversations”. Click on it and presto, a list of your previous conversations with that person.
I would like to thank my mother, my father, my grade 2 teacher Miss Spacey, my cousin three times removed and my stuffed animal Socrates who is no longer with us for encouraging me to pursue this feature. Thank you. Music starts, exit stage left.
Most requested features have been taken care of. Giving the user the ability to clean up their inbox and seeing the conversations they started! :-)
After you respond to an email you can archive it using the “archive conversation” button at the bottom of the conversation. It is that simple.
Why archive and not delete? Just in case you ever need to go back to it! :-)
Why can’t I bulk archive messages? Part of me is lazy and the other part of me prefers you to at least look at the message before you archive them! Just out of politeness to the people who took the time to message you :-). It sucks for those who have been on the site for a while but look at the bright side… at least you do not have approx. 500 messages in your inbox like I do! :-)
Want to see a message that you archived or all the messages you sent out? It is easy… just click on “view: All Mail” from your inbox.
You might also notice something different happens when you respond to a message. Check it out, tell me what you think! :-)
Happy?
Sometimes two kids, no matter how much adult intervention there is, just can’t get along. When this happens the adults just have to make sure to keep the two kids as far apart as possible to prevent problems from occurring.
Believe it or not, this happens among adults as well, so I had to develop a “Block User” feature that allows users to block one another when they just can’t get along.
So what happens when you block another user on FetLife you do not get along with:
I also watch the block list so that if someone is being blocked by many different people I can start asking questions.
How do I block a kinkster I am not getting along with you ask? Go to their profile and under their picture click “Block”… it is as simple as that!
Tell me what you think!
I have been exchanging emails back and forth with TwistedA and he just recently introduced me to a new term: Heteroflexible
‘Heteroflexible’ was a term that BlackOrchid introduced to me, to help me better self-identify. My understanding is that it basically says to the world, “yes, I’m a person who loves people of the other sex (=heterosexual) but I’m also a very open-minded person who won’t rule out some sort of sexual encounter at some point with a person of the same sex”. Thus, giving rise to the combination of the two words “heterosexual” and “flexible”. It also suggests that while I may normally prefer the opposite sex I’m not entirely “straight” in the traditional sense.
The reason I like that term so much is that the other similar terms don’t really ring true for me. To me, ‘bisexual’ means someone who’s interested in exploring not only occasional contact but also fully realized relationships with people of both genders. To me, ‘bi-curious’ seems like someone who hasn’t made up their mind yet. It could mean someone who really isn’t sure whether or not they might want those contacts and relationships someday so is leaving the door open. And that’s why I’m not really comfortable identifying with either of those terms.
Whereas ‘heteroflexible’, in my mind, sets a clear definition of who I am and what possibilities I’m leaving open. I’m not really bi, but I have made up my mind. So I’m neither of the other two terms. I primarily identify as a heterosexual, but I’m completely open-minded about interacting with another guy, though am not interested in a true bi-sexual relationship.
I really think popularizing this term heteroflexible is very important. There is a big gap between bi-curious and bi-sexual and Heteroflexible fills it.
For me bisexual means you like both sexes equally and bi-curious means you have never been with the opposite sex before but once you are you might consider liking both men and women equally once you do try.
Part of me even says we do not even need bi-curious anymore. Bi-curious is not a sexual orientation, it just means you want to be sexual with someone of the opposite sex so you can requestion your sexual orientation and bi-curious is not a sexual orientation by itself.
I have gotten a couple really interesting emails from people that is leading me to requestion the sexual orientations that are listed on FetLife. This is good! :-)
UPDATE: Thanks to MasterABD for looking up Heteroflexible in the Urban Dictionary for us:
“A person who enjoys sex with both male & females but considers themselves heterosexual in the sense that they do not relate with the same sex for an emotional relationship like a bi-sexual could. Heteroflexible is a heterosexual person that is beyond the bi-curious stage but would never engage in an emotional relationship with the same sex.”
Where did I go you ask? Not far at all, I just didn’t really do any development work last week. I spent most of my time relaxing, getting outside and thinking! And that is a good thing! :-)
I am back to development work though today and hope to start moving ahead on things that have been promised to you guys a while ago with at least one improvement coming before the end of the day tomorrow! :-)
Stay tuned my friends! :-)
… and people seem to be liking it:
OMG I was splitting my gut listening to you and PizzaBabe. The both of you compliment each other on the Podcast. I was laughing so hard I was crying. Too Fkn funny I’ll take Pizzababe in when she comes to Montreal not a problem.
ok now for the anal stuffing in the mouth….. Gross… wipe your dick before stuffing it in someones mouth please the shit on there is just nasty
Well, except for the anal direct to mouth part that PizzaBabe is into… that is just gross Pizza… how could you ever do that! :-p.
and I was hoping you could help me out. I am looking for “the best of” books on BDSM, Fetishes, Sexual Orientation and Gender. I am not looking for fiction, I am looking for books that are academic in nature. Books that cover theory, history and psychology. I doubt I will find one book that covers all three neither was I thinking that I could read just one book and feel like I “knew it all”. I am just looking for a good place to start. :-)
Does anyone have any suggestions or know what books are the “have to reads” for people interested in BDSM, Fetishes and Sexual Orientation and Gender?
I am sure you remember when you first signed up to FetLife and you asked yourself: “ok, now how do I see if I know anyone on FetLife?”.
Quickly you realized there was no easy way. You had to go from state to state… province to province… and see if you recognized anyone you knew. Great first impression we left on you didn’t we? Don’t answer the question please! :-)
You won’t have to go through that pain again, unless of course you are a sadist, wait, we have a lot of those here. But I digress.
New members and old can now from FetLife’s home page click on “Find & Invite Your Friends” and by just entering your email address and password (for your email account) we can show you which contact of yours are on FetLife and with the click of one button request their friendship.
After you request friendship with your contacts you can invite your other friends not on FetLife to FetLife.
I recommend you use the Friend Finder once a month to see if any of your friends recently signed up to FetLife.
Try out our Fried Finder and tell me what you think.
I have seen a spoof this good in a long time! Rubber 55, a latex clothing company, did a spoof of MTV’s cribs… if you are into latex you have to check it out:
Almost 80,000 people have watched the video on YouTube alone. Very impressive numbers, especially for something like Latex that is not that “mainstream”.
You have to love their tagline from the end of the clip: “What happens behind closed doors is our business.”
Rubber 55 seems to have a really great collection of Latex clothing. You should check out their site.