Sexual Deviants Living In A Web 2.0 World

Comments made in a picture you uploaded to FetLife, should only friends be able to comment on your pictures? Or should the whole community be able to comment on your pictures?

Their are pros and cons with both.

If only friends can comment on your pictures…

• Pros: You will feel more comfortable uploading pics because not just anyone will comment on your pictures. (Problem will be magnified with more people signing up.)
• Cons: You will not get as many comments.

If anyone can comment on your pictures…

• Pros: You will get a lot more comments.
• Cons: You will get a lot more comments. A lot more emails because of people leaving comments. You will have to manage your comments. And you might get annoyed and stop uploading pictures. (You can not delete comments made on your pics just yet.)

Maybe it is each to his or her own. Some want everyone to be able to comment and others want to limit it to their friends.

I might have not made any sense here but if I did and you have an opinion please chime in. If I made absolutely no sense here but have an opinion on some other subject well then chime in as well! By chiming in I mean leave a comment in the comment section :-p.

No seriously, I can’t believe it. This is really friggn funny or sad or something else. I can’t figure it out LOL.

Thanks to HeadMaster for sharing this with me on FetLife. He describes the show as follows:

Alexyss Tylor hosts a show with her mother in what can only be described as the oddest conversation about sex, ever. What kind of sex has she been having?

Enjoy my friends LOL…

One of the first questions I asked myself when I first sat down to design FetLife was:

Should I make it possible for couples to be able to sign-up as a couple?

I decided against it. Why? For one simple reason, no matter how strong a relationship or D/s relationship you are in you are still an individual. You have friends, you socialize, you have your own email address, you have your own interests, concerns, questions and conversations.

If FetLife was a dating site, which it is not, then signing up as a couple would make sense, but FetLife is a social utility that let’s you stay connected with the Fetish community and your Fet friends. Signing up as a single person just makes more sense for you to get the most benefit out of the site.

So that is why you can not create an account as a couple. But the shitty part on FetLife was that you and your partner could not connect your profiles in any way. Now, I admit, that was annoying and that was what was lacking.

As of today that has changed. From both a traditional relationship and D/s relationship perspective you can now specify the status/type of relationship you are in and with whom.

If you are in a relationship, are engaged or married you can now say to whom on the site you are in a relationship with for everyone to see and be able to easily link to your partner’s profile.

From a D/s relationship perspective you can do the same thing. If you are someone’s Master, Owner, Top or Daddy you can specify whose. And from the other side, if you are owned and collared, owned, a slave of, a pet of, a bottom, under consideration, under protection, a babygirl of or a babyboy of you can easily specify that you are and to whom!

I want to send out a big thanks to MJsgirl of Melbourne Chains and MJ’s ToyBox for helping me better understand D/s relationships. Anything I got right was thanks to her. Anything I got wrong was because I did not listen to her! :-)

So you are in a relationship or D/s relationship and want to see how it all works? Log into to your account and click edit from the top navigation. It will be right their!

If you have any feedback on how I can improve my implementation please don’t hesitate to leave them in the comments section or msg me privately. I am sure I screwed up the of/to/by in a couple places!

Everyone bitched and I heard them loud and clear! Admittedly, everyone had a really good reason for bitching. So I got what I deserved!

As of under two hours ago you can easily add/update/remove the most common fetishes that you are into or curious about from one page.

I am sure all of you are asking yourself what is up with “most common” fetishes? I can’t get anything by you can I! I could not make a form with over 200 fetishes (and growing) on it so what I did was distill the list of fetishes to what I considered to be the most common fetishes which ends up being about 70 fetishes.

So now, from your profile, you can click on the “bulk add most common fetishes” link that is to the right of the fetishes header. And presto, you are on the bulk adding/editing/removing form.

I know, for many of you it is a little too little to late since you have already added the fetishes that you are into or curious about onto your profile page but think of it this way; all of you influenced all the new members experience on FetLife!

I have a question for all of you know, is their a fetish that really should be on the list of “most common” fetishes that I totally forgot?

→ visit FetLife.com and check out the changes

And I was hoping to not have to deal with this aspect of my job for at least another couple of weeks… but unfortunately I was not so lucky!

One of the most important parts of my job is to protect everyone on FetLife from the bullshit and assholes we sometimes come across on the internet. I have to admit the assholes are far and few between but all it takes is a couple rotten eggs to ruin the experience for everyone.

A new friend of mine I meet through FetLife forwarded me a message she received from a guy on FetLife that really disturbed both her and I. At first I was like, maybe the guy was having a bad day and I will send him a polite “please don’t do this again” email. But after doing 5 minutes of research I found out this guy sent the same disturbing message to 34 different women. Now that upset me!

It upset me because I felt like I was doing a bad job at protecting everyone from the .01% of the population that does not know the difference between play and being a jerk face.

So what did I do about this person after doing my research. I saved all the information I have on him including his IP address. I deleted his account and everything to do with him and I sent him a polite message explaining that I am sorry but I had no choice but to suspend him from FetLife and delete his account.

In the email I explained exactly why I made the decision to delete his account and I also told him that he is more then welcome to email me if he wants me to listen to his side of the story. But if he goes and creates another account and does the same thing all over again I will forward all the information I have on him including what he has sent to members of FetLife both to his ISP and to the local authorities.

You might think this is extreme but you had to see what this guy was saying and what he was portraying himself as. It was unethical and really scary!

Why am I telling all of you out their about this is because I want you to know I take this shit seriously and if anyone sends you anything you feel that makes you feel uncomfortable please don’t hesitate to forward it to me… you might not be the only that is being rubbed the wrong way by that user!

Together, as one, we will beat these jerk faces down! (My new favorite expression… jerk faces… LOL)

Just under an hour ago I uploaded the last major component as part of the updates to the picture section on each persons profile. The first version was boring… we think this version is much better!

What has changed?

• We have cleaned up the picture the individual picture page… now their is more focus on the picture.
• If a kinkster has uploaded more then one picture of themselves now you can easily move between them with next and previous buttons.
• Users can add captions to their pictures, from what I have seen so far I like the captions people are putting!
• You can now comment on pictures… this is the big thing so let me repeat myself… you can now comment on picture… and I hope that encourages people to upload more. I love pictures! :-)

Enjoy theses updates but I can promise you that their will be more coming this week. The major one being able to bulk update the fetishes you are into and or curious about!

I have to send out a big thank you to everyone who has been promoting FetLife down under because we have had a huge growth in the number of kinksters from Australia signing up to FetLife in the last week no thanks to me but thanks to you!

My favorite part of the growth is that people from Australia have been getting really active in the community. I don’t know what they put in the water down their but every single Aussi I have spoken to has been super nice and in many cases super sexy!

All this to say welcome welcome my Kinky Australian friends to FetLife. Take off your coat, not your high heels or thigh highs (I prefer them on), get comfortable and stay a while!

The ShackledMaidens are using a little YouTube to promote themselves. Nice to see them use a little bit of social media to promote themselves…almost 450,000 people have seen the video in just under one year.

If you are into witches, shackles, torture, whipping and some really interesting medieval torture devices you might just like this video.

A big thanks to Bearzshaggyda for sending me the link to this video.